It's Been A Long Time

I am finally starting to feel like myself again. My whole family...literally uncles, aunts, mom, dad, son, everyone have been plagued with the most awful cold for the past week. I seriously thought I was going to die. I was on my death bed. Ok maybe I'm being a smidge dramatic. My mom offered to watch my son but pretty soon illness struck her and she was confined to bed with fever, chills, cough, and congestion too. Thankfully, we are all fine now minus my son who developed an ear infection in the process. But like I said before he is a trooper. Ear infections never phase him his only symptoms seem to be runny nose and ear tugging. That's when I know to hit up the doctor with him.

Aside from being sick we are going to Texas this weekend for my sister's spring break. My grandma lives on the beach and she is obviously dying to spend time with her great grand son and I am dying to have a true vacation where I don't have to do a thing. My grandma loves Little Man. She begs me to let him move with her so I can get situated in life, travel, try new jobs etc but I can't be without him so it's not going to happen. But I am really fortunate to have sooo much family that support me!

In other news I got a job! I start when we get back from Spring Break. It's 8-4 and a bank job so we will see. It's like a foot in the door thing plus I need money. I'm looking into daycare right now and that is stressing me out. I don't want to send my son to just anyone and the daycare I would send him to no questions asks is completely out of my price range and there is a waiting list. But it's an awesome daycare, a great facility, and a wonderful loving staff. My family has used them for years.

Well, that's my update for now. Happy Monday! I will be back with Little Man's 16 month post later.
<3 Kim

Burnt Out

I feel so burnt out right now. I absolutely love, love, LOVE being a mom but recently it's become super draining (more than usual). I feel like every day is a constant struggle with the recent onset of THE TANTRUM. Seriously, these aren't little fits anymore, they last long and involve yelling, crying, hitting, toy throwing, and rolling on the floor. Oh, not to mention I'm on my own for this because his dads in LA LA land and I don't mean Los Angeles.

I don't even want to blog because I can't hear myself think. I'm also pretty sure that's why I've been hardcore about losing weight and getting in shape. It's something I can do to burn off stress and feel more in control of life. You know instead of planning  life around naptimes and mealtimes and levels of crankiness.

So here is to 14 months...which according to babycenter says a toddler will take joy in making others yell and cry.

<3 Kim


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Don't Set The House On Fire

Do you ever have one of those days where you just don't give a damn? I know I do and today was one of those days. I was tired as hell because I stayed up all night searching for recipes I need because I will be baking for holiday gifts. On top of that A&E and was showing Intervention and Hoarders and those two shows always seem to suck me in. Next thing I remember is looking at the clock that read 2 AM and forcing myself to keep my eyes open long enough to see if the orange and yellow haired girl went to rehab. Seriously, I needed to know because she needed it more than anyone I've seen on that show. Especially when she was saying gems like this, and I quote, "He's got a lot going for him. He has a place and he sells pot". I guess it didn't matter that he looked dirty and had one tooth.

Anyway I woke up cranky and tired.and to top it off I couldn't find any lids to Little Man's sippy cups.  I didn't feel like making breakfast either so I gave him cheerios, a banana and some blueberries. Yup, absolutely no effort in that. Then after breakfast was over and he decided to pull all the DVD's out of the cabinet I seriously could care less. I figured as long as he's not endangering himself and the house isn't on fire why bother. He wants to color inside a book go ahead. He wants to empty out the basket with his diapers and wipes, sure why not. Mommy is tired. So while he destroyed the house minute by minute I sat there drinking my coffee and counting down the hours til naptime. A naptime which never came.


<3 Kim

Applesauce

The weather is yucky yet again. On top of being hot in muggy it's rainy and dreary too. We can't play outside and we can't go to the pumpkin patch so we made applesauce with some of the apples we picked this past weekend. Well, I made the applesauce while little man banged pots together and helped throw a few apples in the pot for me.

Our applesauce cameout. I need to go back to this orchard ASAP and get more apples. The sauce was sweet without me having to add any sugar which is good because I don't want Little Man having unnecessary sugar.



To make the sauce I just used 5 apples and I wanted to see how a mixture would taste so I grabbed one of each variety we picked. (Stayman, Rome, Fuiji, Red Delicious, Winesap) I peeled, cored, cut them into chunks and threw them in a pot with a tiny bit of water. When they got soft and the juices began to cook out of them I started mashing them with a potato masher and that was it. Easy Peasy! (I left the sauce a little chunky because Little Man refuses to eat purees these days)



<3 Kim

Finally...Acceptance

Today M and I were joking around and I started dancing because he has always talked about my lack of skills in that department. Honestly, I have no rhythm whatsoever and I blame my mom. She’s an awful dancer as well. In fact I went to her 25-year college reunion and her friends made it a point to tell me just how awful she was. Anyway I’m dancing and you can see my belly that is when M says, “I’m sorry Little Man did that to you”. It caught me off guard for a second and then I said, “It’s fine I’m just glad to have him”.

This got me thinking. I used to be so appearance obsessed. I had to have the perfect hair, nice clothes, designer things, flat stomach etc etc. I remember when I gained 8 pounds after my first year of college and I lay in bed crying saying how ugly I was while M tried to console me. For weeks I would wake up in the middle of the night a wreck because I felt unattractive. I didn’t want to wear a bathing suit that summer and I started eating Special K cereal only and working out for an hour 2x a day. Now none of these things seem to matter anymore.

After the birth of Little Man my stomach was not the same anymore. Even after working out religiously, eating right, and losing 60 pounds my stomach still looks like a little pouch. Not to mention the stretch marks that seem to plague my once cute belly piercing that is now M.I.A. All I know is that when I look in the mirror instead of feeling depressed and thinking like my life is over like I once would have I feel proud that my body supported another life. And although I may never be able to wear the cute string bikinis again I’ve learned the big lesson that there is more to life than superficial things and that’s something worth being happy about.

<3 Kim